come undone

a quickie

For the umpteenth time since October I have a cold. The colds vary in intensity and disappear for a week or two then returns after a romp at Gymboree or a playdate. And we use the disinfectant wipes and all that jazz. I usually feel like crap when I've got a lot of work or running around to do, so here I sit finishing a project, waiting for the Nyquil to kick in. My voice was gone this weekend and my hearing is shot to shit, but I am happy to report that I can finally breathe from one nostril. My mom is topping by to assist me for a few hours so I can get a job and maybe even snooze a bit...which probably won't happen because  the czar gets very nervous when I disappear. Can't sleep well when Mom-eeeeee is echoing through the rooms.

Anyway...I'm halfway done with Practical Wisdom for Parents - Demystifying the Preschool Years.  The first section eased my anxieties about preschool and when to start the czar. According to this book, and my gut, I shouldn't start the czar until he's 3. There's a lot of pressure to start at 2 around here and it was really getting to me. This section made me feel better. The rest of the book deals with schedules and discipline. There's nothing we haven't heard before, but scenarios are provided and they do have a way of reminding you that you're not crazy. So far, it's an OK read. It's written by former NYC nursery school directors, if that means anything to anyone. 

New with the czar: a love of drawing with crayons and watercolor painting.  He is very proud of the artwork gracing our walls...and I'm proud of it too.

I'm off to bed. The Nyquil is kicking in. ahhhhhhh

more notes

When it comes to raising my czar, there are many days when I notice that I don't know my ass from my elbow. There are many days when I am opinionated and overprotective and there are many days when I need to hide in the closet with some Russian Standard. Today I purchased Practical Wisdom for Parents - Demystifying the Preschool Years with the hopes that its contents will help build my confidence or at least teach me how to fake it. So far, so good. I'll let you know if I read something profound.

Zach, the czar and I were having lunch this afternoon in a very crowded Panera Bread. The czar happily inhaled a peanut butter and jelly sandwich, apple juice, a blueberry yogurt and potato chips. Once finished, he spent a good half hour spinning around in his seat watching everyone eat. Sometimes he'd strike up a conversation with a hi or hey or oh yeah! and sometimes people ignored him and he just stared at them...but he always let everyone know who his mommy was in case they were wondering. I'd get tapped on the arm every once in a while while he announced MOM-eeee!. Very cool.

Baby News:
My sister made it to 32 weeks!  That's a very good thing. She's still on her back in the hospital...Can't wait to meet the little bugger who's making so much trouble these past 7 weeks. And since she can't hide it any longer, I'm outing my SIL. She's expecting her first munchkin this July. In 12 months my family grew.

And that's all folks...I am off to read another chapter in my new book. So far, I don't see anything on slapping cats, dogs, mothers and children.

notes

Just finished this week's work. Ahhhhhh....Not much happening but I can't let a week go by without saying something. I lack the ability to create paragraphs today, so I'm resorting to bullets. Forgive me.

• Bought tickets for London and Greece to visit family. We'll be away 2 weeks starting in late May. I'm dreading the flights already.

• The czar is back to slamming me in the face. Not as often as it used to be, but it still pisses me off.

• He's talking and singing up a storm yet still signing "hungry" and that's the one word he won't learn. He says "what did you do?" perfectly.

• My home is a disaster. I don't really care because my nails look good.

• Last Monday I became "mommy."  I really miss "mama." It was so sweet and innocent.  I was unique...now I'm just another mommy.  My husband is "pappy" now. The czar is consistent.

• Down 8 pounds on The Big Diet and I occasionally go off of it to nurse the recurring cold.  Down 14 since September.

• Got some shoes at DSW...it was a beautiful experience.

open up and say "ahhhh"

The czar had his first dental visit yesterday. I am surprise to report that his teeth are in fantastic shape. He did grip the door frame of the exam room to let out a grand "ohhhhh noooooo!" but once he saw the box of toys he was calm. I really expected a small disaster since there was no prenatal care and other frightening exposures, plus the czars and czarinas were not recognized for their great teeth, you know — hence the creation of the very mushy beef stroganoff. We are awaiting the arrival of The Big Four, the molars that are to creep in soon if they haven't started to already. 

Special thanks to the NYC water supply for providing flouride.

A Czar, A Monkey, and 2 Lousy Photographers

(continued from Susan's arena.) 

Maybe one day we'll able to capture the two looking AT the camera.  How dare they interact and play and ruin every photograph...hmmmph!

photos!

The czar at 6 months.  I was in the supermarket parking lot when the video arrived at home. I remember being on the phone with Wendi in my car having a freak out.  No groceries were purchased that day.

The czar at 15 months on trip 1, three weeks later.

The czar at 18 months on trip 2, twelve weeks later wearing his Visa Outfit, the nicest outfit the home had. I remember how they kept it in a closet with an iron. We were able to take him to the city for his visa photo that day. No baby home rep, no agency rep, just us and the translator and it was really weird. The czar freaked because it was his first glimpse of life in the big city.

At the hotel in St. Pete on July 4. Court was the 3rd and our ten days were waived. The quiet little man began to babble once his bum hit the bed. Our family was able to see him live via video on Skype. It was weird how we all just watched him for hours on end.  I think he ate a container of Gerber Graduate treats that day. I didn't care. He was mine!

Today at 2. 

good things

Alexander made me smile this weekend. He also drove me nuts, but these things made up for it:

1) Singing "A-B-B-C" while wandering around A Big Manly Home Store. All on his own.

2) Hearing him say "cheeeese!" when having his photo taken. I think he got that from Elmo. They had a big chunck of Swiss cheese walking around with a camera.

3) Watching his grandpa and papa rip up the kitchen floor, then grabbing a tool to help get the job done. He knew what he was doing.

4) Adding "peeeaaaase" to his over-the-top demands. How do you say no to "peeeaaaase?"

5) Catching him making flirty faces in the mirror then catching him later that night at a restaurant using those same faces for two women seated next to us.  What a player.

edited to add: holy crap, this was my 500th post.

it's the return of The Big Food List

What the czar is eating these days...he got picky on me.

1) Trader Joe's cereal with soy milk
2) french toast
3) toast with peanut butter
4) english muffin with butter
5) pancakes
6) soup with pasta, veggies and/or meatballs (he like soup...)
7) whole wheat grilled cheese
8) some crazy hot dogs I found at Trader Joe's that are free of nitrates and gluten free and all that jazz.
9) whole wheat pasta with tomato sauce and romano cheese
10) london broil
11) meatballs with onion and garlic
12) peas
13) corn
14) rice with veggies
15) brown rice
16) cucumbers and kalamata olives in oil and vinegar
17) granola bars
18) grapes
19) apples
20) tomatoes
21) chocolate (he has an addiction, like his mother)

He refuses to eat chicken but I can get it in him in the form of dinosaur-shaped nuggets and sausage. And forget about fish...because of his eczema we have to stay away from eggs, but an egg prepared in a meal doesn't effect him. He will also try anything on my plate and will give me a "whatta you crazy?" look if it's not to his liking.

Gotta break 25 pounds....gotta break 25 pounds...

I got nuthin'

Nothing exciting to write about these days except my love of Nyquil and my sister reaching her 30-week mark tomorrow . She's still in the hospital hanging out until she gives birth which can be at any time... so while I wait for something exciting to report, enjoy some czar photos:

and...

The Blank Space in Our Family Album  (a NY Times piece about infertility/adoption)