come undone

Monday in New York

We are home from Gymboree this morning because I have an axe through my head. Feel like I do anyway...and the czar is everywhere. He is on the tired side and spending the first two hours of today bitching and moaning...actually most mornings are like this now. My foyer and livingroom are littered with cars and I've already been told "NO!" several hundred times.  He is currently playing in the bathroom sink. Alone. Because it is just easier than fighting with him. I am listening carefully and checking on him often.  I put one of those foamy door stoppers in the door and he cannot figure out why he's unable to slam the door. He is unable to do one of his dramatic "GO AWAY" scenes with a door slam. I'd really like to lock him in there for a few hours but that would be bad. 

Last Friday we had another dental visit. This time he showed excitement upon entering  the office. We tried to find Nemo in the fish tank and everything was wonderful until Dr. D's male assistant came out. "Alexaaaaander..." It was all over.  At our last visit, the czar gripped the doorway. This time he had a firm hold on me. We had him straddle me and leaned him backwards for an upside down checkup. He screamed throughout it all but Dr. D was able to get in there. All is well in this little mouth. We've been lucky

Let's see...vocabular explosion, full sentences, eats when he wants to, can move furniture...things are OK here. But is IS only 9:15 AM.

Thursday in New York

Life has been a bit of a blur here. I have been loaded with work, which is wonderful and the czar is just being very czar-like. His personality is emerging...he is now his own person, no longer a let's-see-how-they-respond-to-this-puppet.  He knows it all and will fight to prove his physical and intellectual strength. He has a stubborn streak that drives me completely bat shit and he is into Thomas the Tank Engine again. He is getting taller and that means he can touch every damn thing. He is an expert at locking a computer, screwing with the DVR feature on our cable remote and removing carving knives from the dishwasher. He has a newfound shyness with strangers and increased his vocabulary with "oh shit" and "Joe Biden."  The big event of the day: he has poured urine from the purple potty to the floor once  too many times...it was by accident, but he keeps ignoring my pleas to "just let mommy do it, PLEASE."  No, we have not perfected the potty thing. It is simply a fun game right now. Really frickin' fun...

well said

I didn't want to get political, but I've got a blog that a hell of a lot of people read it (and I thank you for that). I wanted to share Powell's words because his words echo mine. It's the racism that bothers me in this campaign and I really like what Powell had to say. Just wanted to share...

just shy of 3 years, my son looks huge

   

alive!

I'm taking half the day off from medical publishing to take the czar to a pumpkin patch this morning. Should be interesting since he's a bit nasty this morning. I may have to leave him there if the attitude continues...I'm such a good mom.

Let's see...what's been going on...

The czar ate half a tube of Neosporin yesterday so I was on the phone with the Poison Control Center. Apparently, it is not considered a terible thing. I cleaned out his mouth with a wet washcloth and gave him a drink. Awesome...

And the neosporin was out because the cat slashed his face last week. I wasn't angry about it since the cat endured a lot of abuse before this happened: hit with a wooden spoon, chased into a corner, beaten, all that good stuff. This morning the czar scratched his own face in his sleep...and I trim those nails constantly and they grow and grow. I give up.

In the potty training department, it's the same ol' story. He knows what to do he just doesn't know when he should be doing them. He can't pinpoint that "gotta go" feeling so I bought another case of diapers. He'll tell me when he's ready.

He eats when he wants to, but he's not consuming much of anything. I make him food and leave it out for him. If he doesn't eat, I don't force it. And I'm not making twenty meals for this kid...this week I've given him Carnation instant breakfast in the morning and at night so he can grow and live.  makes me feel better that he gets at least 200 calories in him every day. Good times...

And don't get me started on the trash that lives across the call from me...they're one complain from getting  thrown out of the building and I may be the one to do it. If they wake up my son one more time with their cursing and fighting, everyone is getting a phone call.  Bastards...

OK, off to the pumpkin patch...then I return to work. Eleven freelance projects, folks. It's sucking the life out of me, but it's OK. Really.

good things

I've been all over the place...but I'm in a good mood. Really. I'm actually feeling good about life these days.

Maybe it's because I'm sitting next to five leaf bags full of clothes we just don't need anymore which leaves us with big, emoty closets and roomy drawers. Maybe it's because the small table and a large plastic bin, that once lived in our bedroom, now sit by the door, ready to be tossed. Perhaps it's because the kitchen has been scrubbed clean and the counters are currently free of fruit juice stains and whatever else...even the stove shines. I know the new dining table has something to do with this good mood. It looks great. I know the laundry is done: two tremendous bags of laundry have been returned to us, its contents clean and folded beautifully. Yes, I sent it all out and found a cheap, good place that would do it. Maybe it's because the husband started a new job in Connecticut and he's actually happy...he'll never be home again, but he's happy. Perhaps it's because my mom's birthday was Saturday and we feasted on Chinese food for a few hours... maybe it's because my cutie petootie niece was baptised today and we feasted again...oh the cake was nice and I just wanna squeeze her feet. Maybe it's my son — my little boy has been slightly clingy but very loving towards me which means hell may break loose tomorrow but I won't think about it.  Maybe it's work,,,the regular bust-my-ass-for-pennies-but-I-gotta-do-it-because-it's-money job is no longer the main source of income. The go-ahead-and-pay-me-big-bucks medical publishing firm now loves me (they LOVE me!) and they've decided to give me a substantial amount of work. Whatever the reason, I'm just enjoying the ride.

And I'll probably have something to bitch about afterour Gymboree classes tomorrow. 

                                                    

ch-ch-ch-ch-changes

Today is Potty Training Day. Kinda, sorta. After viewing Elmo's potty video four or five times and discussing the fact that everyone, in fact, uses the potty, the czar has decided to try again.  Today we are diaperless, running around in just a big t-shirt. The purple potty is ready to go on the bathroom floor and a happy, cushioned seat awaits him on The Big Bowl.  So far he's conquered his fear of climbing on The Big Bowl but has major performance anxiety. Poor kid.

I'm doing my best to be patient.

Alexander the Terrible has returned

It's a joy to watch your three-foot-nothing toss chairs, car and food around. He has a cold which I'm sure is attributing to this fabulous behavior...it frickin' exhausts me. I feel for the cat who had his head held against the floor and was slapped with a wooden spoon. I wanted to leave my child out by the curb.  Right now, he's sitting on the couch watching Wow Wow Wubzy chanting "ahhhh....ahhhhhh....AHHHHH." 

Oh and my mother in law is coming to stay for like three or four months. My SIL and I will be sharing her...have I mentioned that she doesn't speak English? Have I mentioned that I don't speak Greek? Have I also mentioned that my home is clean on the surface but is home to hidden layers of dust and cat hair? Good times ahead, folks...more to come.

then there's this...

Official bitch day

It's Official Bitch Day!

I have a few things I can bitch about but I'm actually in a good mood this morning and can't seem to get myself in a full-blown bitching mode...but I do have some thoughts...

Sarah Palin...ohhh boy. If McPalin (thanks for this, Susan) is elected she's a heartbeat away from the presidency. I enjoy watching her speak because she lacks the ability to answer a question. She talks in circles to cover up the fact that she just doesn't know anything.  I mean, listen to her...really listen to her:  Interview with Katie Couric

People at the supermarket...stay the hell away from my child...don't my child and don't give him cookies.

My neighbors...keep slamming your door...really, keep doing it. We enjoy having the walls vibrate...my son doesn't need to sleep at night. Really, it's cool...bastards.

Work...PAY ME. I make your deadlines, now issue me a check, damnit.

That's all I've got for now...that wasn't too bad.